"Killing My Body to Save My Mind" by Lauren Slater

Lauren Slater, the author of "Killing My Body to Save My Mind", suffers from obesity. However this obesity is actually a side affect of a psychotropic drug she takes, called Zyprexa. This essay is about how Slater chose to accept these side affects in order to heal from her depression. It starts off with a narrative of the author's experience being tested at a life insurance office. Then she goes on to describe how she began taking the medication that caused her to gain so much weight. Lauren Slater suffered from a depression so bad, she experienced psychotic hallucinations. None of the new drugs she was prescribed worked, until she was put on Zyprexa. This drug did lift her depression, but it also made her hungry for food all the time. Even after her appetite stopped growing, she kept gaining weight. This put her at risk for a variety of weight related diseases, including diabetes. However, Slater describes how she accepted the risks and the breakdown of her body in order for her mind to be free of depression and her life to be happy. She expresses this trade off in terms of Descartes's theory of dualism. He thought of "the body as one thing and the soul, or mind, as another... the mind and body were so different as to practically exist in separate realms" (Slater 259). Lauren Slater concludes that in her experience she has had to choose her mind over her body, and though it is scary, it is worth it to her. The combination of her narrative and her allusion to Descartes idea help her to demonstrate her purpose: to show how the choices in our life have consequences, and we have to make the most of them. Through both of these strategies, narrative and allusion, Slater appeals to both the emotions and the logic of the reader by presenting her own choice, and the emotions and philosophy behind it, as well as the negative and positive effects. Despite the dangers of Zyprexa, it helps make her life worth living, and that is what is important to her. Slater makes this point clear, that some things are worth sacrificing for the gaining of others.

Lauren Slater references Descartes's theory of dualism to illustrate how she chose the health of her mind over the health of her body (image from kheper.net).